Monday, 29 March 2010

Vampyres - now officially a blue movie

See what I did there? You see, Vampyres is coming out on Blue-Ray (region one only, apparently... boo), and... oh well, please yourselves.
There's a running joke where I work that I spend my evenings watching vampire lesbian films, which whilst not exactly untrue, isn't exactly true either. Although I would like someone to explain why female vampires are, in nine out of ten cases, lesbians. I have yet to see Lesbian Vampire Killers, mainly because of an aversion to anything James Corden has had his greasy mitts on (Gavin and Stacey excepted, although if ever there was a programme with diminishing returns, it was that one), and by all accounts it is absolute crap. Vampyres, on the other hand, is NOT crap, although it is incredibly saucy. Made in 1974 by Euro-sleaze cheeky chappie Jose Larraz, it basically acts as a blueprint for the antics of every young goth girl who's ever wandered around a foggy graveyard in a big coat (which happens a lot) and then entices sweaty old blokes back to their castle to slice 'em up and drink their blood (which hopefully doesn't). I haven't got round to reviewing it yet, because although I've seen it a dozen times I never seem to have a hand free to make any notes (ahem).
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaanyway, I'm sure being on blue-ray (blueray? blue ray? whatever) will add a HUGE amount to your viewing pleasure, it being made in 1974 and all that. Perhaps it's important you see all that dry humping in excessive detail. Perhaps it will reveal starlets Anulke and Marianne Morris to be a right pair of mingers (although I doubt it). Who knows?
It is a great film, though... saucy, scary and beautifully shot. Go grab a classic big-boobs-and-hairy-pie gorefest.

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